Blind Dates

I've got a friend and she's a beauty
I've got a friend and he's a cutie
They should be friends, if you know what i mean
It's all a part of my harebrained scheme

--Freezepop, Harebrained Scheme

One of the hardest things to accept about a blind date is that, no matter how well-intentioned the connection, no matter how sure someone else thinks two people will get along, sometimes there's no attraction.  It just ends up being someone's harebrained scheme.

But that's the thing about attraction.  It can't be established deterministically.  It can scarcely be predicted.  It can change over time, but that initial spark is there, or it isn't.

If it isn't, we all must learn to accept it, no matter how much it sucks.  It's a fundamental human freedom to determine with whom you want to associate.  So beware those who think they have any claim on you.  There is no trait a person could have that demands you must be attracted to them.  Not money, not status, not appearance, not even being an A-list celebrity.

Aside: My worse blind date story was just an ordinary date, a meeting for dinner or coffee or the like.  In our conversation, the woman mentioned trying a dating service, and getting matched with a man who she had to meet at his home, because he was under home confinement, ankle bracelet and all.  It was an interesting if unfortunate story; I doubt she'd recommend that dating service to anyone!

The "bad beat" story is as follows.  She evidently didn't feel that spark, and thus I didn't get a call back.  That meant I received no more consideration than someone who was actively being punished by the criminal justice system.  Maybe even less; I didn't ask if she saw the guy again or returned his calls.